


Parted Souls

by secretly_tsundere



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/F, F/M, Female Chara, Gender-Neutral Frisk, Gonna get pretty dark up in here, How Do I Tag, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Not a lot of fluff sorry, Other, PTSD Sans, Reader Is Frisk, Self-Hatred, Slow Burn, Smoking, Sorry Not Sorry, Strong Language
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-19
Updated: 2016-11-10
Packaged: 2018-08-23 11:11:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8325505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/secretly_tsundere/pseuds/secretly_tsundere
Summary: It has been almost 10 years since Frisk freed Monsterkind from the Underground and things have been pretty peaceful. 
That is, until Chara steals half of Frisk's soul so she can finally get her revenge.
Frisk leaves their home in the city to end Chara, and is quickly joined by Sans, who hasn't spoken a single word to them since they moved out 2 years ago. Their once strong bond has completely disintegrated and now they find it near impossible to talk to each other, let alone take down Chara. Will they work things out and end Chara's reign of evil, or will they end up destroying each other?





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Whoo here we go.
> 
> Now, I doubt that any of you will know this, but I actually started writing another Undertale fic under the same name a few months ago. But I started to hate it and where the story was going, so I am starting fresh.
> 
> I will try and update as often as I can, but with school 'n everything that may be quite a while so y'all need to be patient okay?
> 
> Please give AS MUCH CRITICISM AS POSSIBLE. This is my first real fic on AO3 (I did a bit of ff.net about a year ago) and I want ALL of your feedback. So don't be afraid to comment whatever the hell you want on it, don't worry about offending me.

Curiosity was always your downfall.

Whether it had been as simple as asking one question too many, or as huge as investigating a dark chasm, rumoured to be teeming with monsters and beasts, you had always managed to stick your nose in something you shouldn’t. This time wasn’t any different.

For years you had dreamed of seeing that mesmerising red again, the sole reminder of your identity back in the Underground. The curiosity of what it had become started as a small irritation, an itch, but something that day had spurred it on to become this desire that greedily ate away at you like a grub. You knew it could only be sated by one thing, but something in the depths of your conscious knew that that thing was a bad idea.

A very bad idea.

But something that day made you forget about that tiny voice of reason entirely, and the desire to reminisce on your time in the Underground was like a puppeteer, tugging on all your strings mercilessly. It was exhausting to fight that urge.

So you gave in.

You imagined pulsing crimson heart emerging from your chest, filling the room with a glorious red glow. You imagined turning it over in your hands, seeing the spider web patterns all over it, reminders of the battles you had lost. You imagined the warmth it radiated, feeling the heat on your hands and face.

You felt the familiar tug on your body and saw what you’d been thirsting for all day. Your soul. It was just as you’d remembered it from years ago, just as breathtaking. You remembered all of the battles. You remembered the monsters you befriended that you now knew as family. You remembered the laughs and the tears. You remembered Asriel and how you condemned him to stay in the Underground like it was a prison.

Then you felt the pain.

It felt as if your whole body was tearing itself apart, atom by atom. You doubled over and then fell, writhing, to the ground. You cried out, tears welling up in your eyes. Looking up, you gasped to see your soul fracturing, looking as if one half was trying to tear itself from the other. With a sickening crack and a burst of white-hot pain, the soul completely broke into two halves.

Except they weren’t halves. And you weren’t dead.

The two halves of your soul had melded into two small, weak-looking souls. One a slightly duller red and the other a deep, dark red that didn’t pulse at all. It looked almost as if it were dead. The lighter of the two souls flew back into your body with surprising force, like a magnet. The other hovered before disappearing altogether.

Chills burned down your spine as a sickeningly familiar voice drifted quietly around the room.

“Thank you, Frisk”

You couldn’t breathe. You couldn’t move. You couldn’t cry or shout for help. It was pointless; you were alone anyway. No one would come. No one cared. No one gave a single shit about your worthless ass. How could you be so damn stupid? How could you let that happen? After time and time again trying to fight the darkness you went and let it run wild on the whole world. Did you have no idea of what danger you could put everyone in?

You were overwhelmed with so many different emotions. Emotions that you hadn’t felt since… You felt guilt, hate, sadness, but above all you were scared. Scared out of your fucking mind. You had seen before what… _it_ could do to the people you loved.

How ironic. You, a person so set on saving everyone, just condemned countless monsters and humans.

You stood up with shaking legs, the room spinning around you. You still could barely breathe, and your cheeks were still dry. Though your heart was heavy with the weight of your decisions, your head felt as if it were stuffed with cotton, unable to quite comprehend the previous event. You found yourself in the bathroom, hunched over the toilet. Your stomach lurched and emptied its contents into it, your whole body shaking with the ferocity of your heaves.

Mid way through stumbling blindly back to your room, you collapsed, pushed down by the sheer force of realisation. You sobbed helplessly, terrified of what the future may bring. You were brought straight back to the times that still haunted your nightmares. When you were never really in control.

You stayed there, on the floor until you fell into a dreamless sleep from sheer exhaustion. You had a feeling that you had just created your own hell on earth.

And you were the only one who could resolve it.


	2. Consecutio

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Actions have consequences.

Sticky black tendrils tightened around your wrists and ankles, snaking their way around your body. With every panicked exhale they tightened, leaving you with increasingly less rancid air to gulp in. You couldn’t see a damn thing. Only darkness. The dull ache surrounding your restrained limbs quickly became more insistent, transforming into a biting pain. You couldn’t feel your fingers or toes anymore. You screamed out for help, for anyone.

But nobody came.

You wished that you didn’t hear the deceptively sweet voice cooing at you through the darkness. “Oh Fri-isk,” The voice sang, “stop struggling, you only came to play, silly!” It giggled, the usually warm sound was cold and empty. “ **You know you can’t escape me!** ” It hissed. You continued to desperately struggle, though it only tightened your bonds.

You suddenly froze as you felt a ghostly hand cup your cheek, “Oh Frisky, you always have been so stubborn, haven’t you. Not a shred of sense in that hard head of yours,” the voice began to get harder, losing the lilting singsong tone it carried. “You’ve been such a good girl, you know, sharing your soul so kindly. It is rather nice to have one again, I must say, pathetic as the damn thing is. But you have so much determination! It feels so wonderful, running through my body.”

Your stomach had dropped through the ground by this point. _It_ forced you to split your soul? How could you be so damn stupid? “Oh you’re not _that_ stupid, Frisk. I suppose I can be rather persuasive when I try. You would know, wouldn’t you? With just a few whispers you went off on a rampage, killing the entire underground.”

Now you were _angry._

You opened your mouth to talk back, but no sound escaped. The voice giggled again, “You can’t put the blame on me Frisky! You know that even you can’t lie to yourself. It was you that murdered the underground, not me!”

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

You woke up in a cold sweat, your sheets tangled around your legs. You could hear this strange screaming noise. You realised you were screaming and clamped your hands over your mouth, hoping that you hadn’t just woken up the entire street. It was 4 am, or at least that’s what your alarm clock said.

It had been just a week since your soul split and you were _feeling_ it. Your fairly regular nightmares had amped up in intensity, often leaving you a shaking, sobbing mess for the rest of the day until you drifted off only to face them again. But this one was different. _It_ had never featured quite like that before. They had felt so… present. So horribly alive.

Your diminished soul also meant that all emotions felt rather dampened. It was difficult for something to make you smile or laugh or even cry. When you once would laugh hysterically at Mettaton’s antics on his shows, you now only felt a small glimmer of happiness. As if you just didn’t have the capacity to feel anymore.

Once the sun started to seep through the curtains, you finally removed yourself from your uncomfortable bed to begin your day. After throwing on the first clothes you found that weren’t just sweatpants, you shambled out of your apartment complex and into your car to get to work.

The city of Edmond was once colourful and bustling, but now you only saw grey buildings and grey people. You couldn’t see the beauty of the world anymore. You went through work like a zombie, mindlessly reading documents and emails over and over.

Though as a child monster ambassador was the dream, Asgore was far more suited to diplomacy and you ended up going through school and then a secretary to a major officer in a monster-oriented company. The officer in question was an asshole, but the pay made up for it. It was hardly your dream job but beggars can’t be choosers.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

You slumped on the lumpy couch that squatted in the main living space of your apartment, exhausted after the long day at work. Forgetting modesty, you kicked off your uncomfortable trousers and tight button up shirt, and replaced it with an old striped sweater which you treasured with all your heart. It was what you were wearing when you fell into the underground, and it followed you through thick and thin. It felt like an old friend in this changed world.

You flicked on the TV and settled for a rerun of one of Mettaton’s movies. This one was about two lovers (both played by Mettaton himself, of course) who run away to the wilderness, seeking happiness. The ‘female’ of the two was slaughtered brutally at the end by her sister (also played by Mettaton) who hated her partner. Unsurprisingly, it was one of his painfully overdramatic tragedies, which once would make you laugh out of their sheer absurdity.

Once.

You didn’t care to change the channel, and ended up watching something you hadn’t seen before. You sat up, the strange familiarity slicing through the haze of your mind. It was a documentary on monsters, celebrating the upcoming tenth anniversary of the shattering of the barrier. Tears rolled down your cheeks as you watched the presenter walk through the abandoned underground, describing the various buildings and landmarks. You could see yourself as a child gleefully playing in the snow, or leaning down to catch the whisperings of the echo flowers. You could see your friends and family guiding you down twisted paths and overgrown roads.

It was the first time you felt anything in a week.

Then your heart lurched as Asgore and Toriel appeared for what seemed like an interview. They talked about life underground, they talked about its history, and they talked about you. They described how you, just a child, fell into their lives and not only freed them, but unified them as a people.

You should have been proud, but you just missed the two of them.

Though the two were far from romantic partnership, they had worked things out for you, and were the closest to any parents you had ever known. Miles better than any parent who would let their child fall into a literal mountain.

You were startled by a bubble of laughter that fled from your mouth, thinking of the strange hilarity of someone _falling into a mountain._ At least you could laugh at yourself, if not anyone else. What a strange life you had lived, enough drama for a couple hundred years, let alone 25.

You also missed your friends. They all lived in the same village (pretty much on the same damn road) in a suburb of Edmond, while you were at least 3 hours away from them in the centre of the city. You missed Alphys, who you would stay up until far past what Toriel would allow, watching anime. You missed Undyne, who you looked up to immensely, who was like the sister you never had. You missed Papyrus so much, his antics, his terrible cooking, all of it.

Sans was a different can of worms that you physically didn’t have the energy to open.

He was different from the others; he understood you like no one else did, with his memory of timelines. He was in the same boat as you, he had been through as much, if not more, as you. You once felt as if you could tell him anything. Well, almost anything.

You also had more nightmares about him than you could count.

You also hadn’t spoken a word to him since you moved out two years ago. In fact, he pretty much disappeared from your life since you started looking for jobs and places in the city 6 months before that. You had at least been calling Toriel every week, and occasionally having Alphys and Undyne over when Alphys had business in the city. Hell, you’d even been to their wedding and seen half the monsters in the underground and didn’t see Sans once. Even Papyrus didn’t know where he was. That skeleton could be such a fucking prick.

You’d realised that once again you’d drifted off in a reverie of thought when the evening news came on with an over-the-top, obnoxious anchor man chattering about the upcoming anniversary. You chuckled darkly, recognising him as a monster-hater whom your company had to deal with on a regular basis.

You were caught off guard, however, when the mood quickly turned solemn and quiet. Your heart sped up as you listened intently to the report.

“Five monster killings have been reported in the town of Ebott, a monster community just a hair away from the famed mountain. They have been confirmed as murders, and have been described as witnesses by knife attacks.”

_Knife attacks?_

“Witnesses also claim that it was in fact a human that had committed these atrocities. There is little evidence to support it, but they described the killer as a human female, with pale skin, short brown hair and wearing a striped, knitted sweater. Some even claimed the killer to have a striking resemblance to the famed ‘Saviour of Monsterkind’, Frisk Dreemurr.”

You could have vomited, or cried. Or both. If the killer was who you think it was, then… Then, you didn’t know what to do. Your heart sank further as accusations would come piling in. What would your family think? What would all the monsters think? What if they believed that you had betrayed them? The news anchor paused and seemed to be listening to his earpiece.

“Recent evidence has come in of some rather disturbing nature. In the home of one of the victims, there has been described by the police as scrawled words over all the walls, reading, ‘Frisk’, ‘No escape’ and ‘come out and play’. Could the freer of the monster race have turned against their roots, or was it some impersonator trying to destroy Dreemurr’s reputation? Stay tuned in, for more information.”

You literally vomited all over the floor. _At least it’s wooden,_ you thought. Emotion failed to come as a numb sensation spread from head to toe. There was no space for emotion. All you could think was _I need to solve this._

You absentmindedly stuffed food and clothes in an old bag and walked straight out of the door with renewed vigour. You started the engine of your tiny Ford Fiesta and drove off without a moment’s hesitation. You would solve this.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

It wasn’t until almost three hours later when you realised where you were driving. An overly cheery sign reading ‘Greenehill’ affronted you as you reached a cluster of houses amongst the country. You felt a twinge of nostalgia as you passed the quaint cottages and small shops lining the small roads. You squinted through the darkness and almost cried as you drove past Grillby’s Diner and Muffet’s spider bakery.

Not even 10 minutes away from Toriel’s house, you screeched on the breaks as a figure suddenly appeared on the road right in front of you. You sat for a moment, shocked, before you briskly left your car and walked round to see if the mysterious figure was okay. You gasped, seeing no sign of life anywhere near you, just a strange sense of static in the air that felt somehow… familiar.

You felt a whisper of fear set in as you eyed your surroundings, your gut telling you that whatever _that_ was, was still hanging around.

“Heya.” You heard a voice behind you, a voice that you hadn’t heard in far too long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the great response from prologue, it is very much appreciated! Don't forget to keep on commenting all your criticisms. I also want to add that I know the pacing is very slow at the moment, but it will pick up soon.
> 
> I just wanted to mention that if you hadn't guessed by now, I'm British so some words may be spelled differently than you'd expect :)  
>   
> [Tumblr](http://secretly-tsundere.tumblr.com/)


	3. Profectio

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there is entirely too much dialogue

“Heya.” You spun around a strange mix of joy, fear, apprehension and anger bubbling in your stomach. “’Been a while, hasn’t it?” He said.  You weren’t sure whether you wanted to hug him or slap him.

You opted for an awkward, “Yep. Two and a half years, in fact.” Your voice cracked with a sudden influx of emotion.

“Wowser.” You heard him say softly.

You couldn’t take the tension anymore and caved into all the pent up anger you had for him. And slapped him right across the face- no, skull.

“I guess I deserved that, didn’t I?” He clutched the side of his face.

“Godammit Sans! I move out like any normal person and you don’t even say goodbye? You didn’t even have the time to spare me a call, or even a text, which I hardly believe?”

He just looked at the ground silently, defeated.

“Fucking hell I’ve missed you, you asshole,” You then enveloped Sans in a hug, sending nostalgia shooting through you. Even his smell reminded you of home, a dry, minty smell mixed with what one could only describe as ‘man’. It was comforting, despite the circumstances.

When the two of you broke away, he looked up into your eyes, his white pupils boring holes into you. “We need to talk.”

The two of you were sitting on a swing set that you remember from years ago, when it wasn’t quite so rusty and disused. The entire park was entirely overgrown, left to the mercy of Mother Nature herself. The swings would creak and complain when moved in the slightest and felt as if they could barely hold your weight. You had endured an incredibly awkward, silent walk to the park and were now thoroughly annoyed at Sans’ apparent lack of care about your feelings and thoughts.

After a few minutes of total silence, Sans shuffled slightly, snapping your attention over to him. He looked like he was searching for something in one of those endless pockets of his. You couldn’t quite make out what the two objects were that he pulled out at first. That was, until he opened up one which was a box, pulled out what looked like a little strip, and lit it with the other object, a lighter.

He never told you that he smoked.

“So,” you said somewhat awkwardly, “you smoke now?” You said it like a question, though you knew there would be no useful answer.

“Yep.” Sans said simply, pausing before taking a long drag of the cigarette and letting the smoke drift slowly out between his teeth.

You sighed, “Maybe we could, I don’t know, ask each other one question at a time?” You wanted to talk about the elephant in the room, but he didn’t seem particularly part of the conversation.

“Sure. You start.” He didn’t even look at you when he answered, just staring at his damn cigarette.

You gave him a poisonous glare, “Why didn’t you speak to me for 2 and a half years?” His vacant gaze suddenly snapped up to meet your pointed stare.

He quickly matched your intensity, not tearing his eyes from you as he took another drag. “Pass. Why did you come back?”

You looked down at the tired asphalt, your voice catching in your throat as you replied, “I-I saw on the TV, that she’s back. C-Chara’s back. She came from the m-mountain and k-killed those poor monsters and now everyone thinks it’s me a-and I have to s-stop her from k-killing any of you.” All of your emotions flooded out, mixing with your sudden tears. It was just a stream of consciousness flowing out of your mouth that you couldn’t stop.

“Hey, hey kiddo, don’t cry on me. You know I can’t deal with that stuff.” He desperately attempted to comfort you. It just made you even sadder how your once strong relationship with the skeleton was broken around your feet. “Is that why you have half a soul?”

You gasped in shock, “How do you know?”

“Cause I can see it.” His white pupils flicked from your tear stained face to your chest. “She had something to do with that, didn’t she?”

You nodded slowly in response, wiping your tears off of your cheeks. He whistled through his teeth and breathed in the cigarette smoke particularly deeply. You both sat in silence for a while longer, thankful that he hadn’t pushed you too much about the soul thing.

You stood up a little while longer and began walking back to your car. Sans’ gaze followed you as you walked off, but he didn’t bother moving himself. You threw yourself back in the car and collected yourself before driving towards Toriel’s house once more. Your mind was running faster than a Hare as you tried to process everything that was going on. Questions also began to whisper through your head.

_What if Toriel isn’t in? What if she doesn’t want me so late at night? What else has changed?_

_Sans smokes?_

It just hurt to feel so out of the loop from the people who you loved most.

You pulled into Toriel’s familiar drive, smiling at the sight of the house you’d previously lived in for years. Not a single light was on in the house, and it seemed do still and peaceful compared to the bustling city you were used to. You gingerly knocked on the front door and heard hurried footsteps in the house shortly after. A light switched on behind the door and it suddenly swung open to reveal a very tired looking Toriel. After recognising you, she swept you into a great hug, chattering away about ‘how lovely it was to see you’.

As you walked in you muttered apologies about the time at which you were visiting but she seemed to brush them off. You were led into the kitchen and sat down, presented with a steaming mug of tea.

“What brings you here, my child?” Toriel said with a hint of concern.

You didn’t want to worry her so replied saying, “I decided after work today that I needed a bit of a getaway after 2 solid years of the city. And you know what the journey is like from there.”

“But still you are quite a bit later than I would have expected. Is everything okay?” She was now clearly concerned about you, placing a soft, furry hand on your shoulder.

“Well, a certain short skeleton almost got himself run over and then stopped for a quick chat.” Your mother’s eyes suddenly turned downcast at the mention of Sans. They had once been very close but it seemed as if he had shut himself off from more than just you.

“He’s not as he used to be, I’m afraid. He smokes, he drinks, he never goes to any family get-togethers and the only person he really talks to is his brother. I’m sorry, Frisk, he just isn’t the same monster that you knew.” She sounded like she was talking about someone who had died, with a strange, calm sadness.

“I know mom, I’m sorry too.” You place a tentative hand on her arm, “I love you.” You smiled before walking off to your old room.

It was the same as you remembered, only barer. There were fewer pictures littering the walls and possessions scattered across every surface. It was still every bit as comforting after the rather unnerving day you had had. You quickly fell asleep, totally exhausted.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

You spent the next day catching up with everyone else, listening to all the news. No one had talked yet about the Ebott murders and it hung around like a dark raincloud. You didn’t see Sans anywhere that day, even though Papyrus was at the house, exuberant as ever. It helped to see everyone again, back out of the city. It helped to remind you of the love that you were fighting for. But you couldn’t help get more uneasy the longer you stayed in Greenehill.

When darkness rolled around you waited for Toriel to fall asleep before you hastily took your bag, wrote a brief apology note and sneaked out of the house, softly closing the door behind you. You winced as the engine of your car burst into life just a little too loud. You cursed yourself as you ran away from your own family like coward. You hadn’t told a single one about your predicament. Well… one if you count Sans.

But you didn’t really count him anymore.

You could tell that Papyrus was a little more downcast than usual, and everyone was slightly more disconnected. Just one brick being taken from the wall made it all crumble down. The absence of bad puns, ketchup bottles and pink slippers seemed to be felt by everyone. But you couldn’t afford to care about that.

You were caught off guard when you thought you glimpsed Sans standing by the side of the road. You braked and then reversed to check if he was really there.

“Off already?” He called out to you from outside, another cigarette in hand.

“Have you become nocturnal? Why do you only seem to appear at night?” He didn’t reply to your joking questions and instead clambered into the passenger seat and shut the door harshly.

“I’m not letting you go.” He said darkly, his pupils gone from his eyes.

“What?”

“I can’t let you go ahead with your plan. I’ve seen the news. I know how you think, Frisk.” You couldn’t deny that hearing him say your actual name after years sent shivers running down your spine. “She’ll kill you before you reach the next state, let alone the mountain.”

You crossed your arms across your chest like a petulant child. “I can’t let her hurt anyone else. I can’t let her hurt my family.” He winced at the last few words. To be fair, you were insinuating that you couldn’t give two shits about him (which wasn’t entirely untrue right now.)

“Well I can’t let her hurt you!” He shouted, realising what he said after he said it. “I-I’m sorry for snapping, it’s just…” he trailed off, looking at his hands.

You turned the car around, tired of his bullshit. _I can leave later_ , you thought. After you offering, he refused to be dropped off and instead wanted to ‘see you home so you didn’t go running off again.’ Sometimes you wish that he didn’t know you quite so well, and seemed to be able to predict what you’d do a couple of hours before you did it.

You were both silent again the whole journey home, until you pulled into Toriel’s driveway and something just felt… _off._ The two of you both slowly got out of the car at the same time, sharing a wary look.

You felt even less at ease when the door swung right open as you touched it. You definitely remembered locking it. The house felt strangely empty as you walked in, not like the usual comforting, warm aura that surrounded it.

You called out to Toriel, but nobody came.

Sans hovered beside you as you crept up the stairs, hoping to find Toriel sleeping soundly. Your stomach dropped as you spotted a few small, _dusty_ footprints littered over the upstairs carpet. Biting your lip, you opened Toriel’s bedroom door slowly to be met with an empty bed. Something was wrong. Very wrong.

You burst into your own bedroom and was horrified when you saw red scrawling covering the walls. It just repeated one word over and over.

_UNSAVED_

Your hands clamped over your mouth as you let out a breathy scream, eyes watering slightly. Turning straight back around, you marched down the stairs and ordered Sans somewhat shakily back into the car, unaware of what the issue was.

You both visited Sans and Papyrus’ house and Undyne and Alphys’ but they were all in a similar state; empty.

After searching both houses you and Sans walked slowly back into the car and collapsed into the seats. Sans sat quietly, a silent rage burning beneath his eye sockets. You, however, were a shaking sobbing mess. You had let this happen. If you hadn’t left your family would still be safe and sound. Your recklessness had put even more lives at risk.

But somehow, you knew that somewhere, they were all still alive. Chara wouldn’t waste opportunities just like that. She was trying to lure you in, and it was working. You just couldn’t leave your families’ lives down to luck.

You wiped your face dry and took back the steering wheel, back on course for your initial plans. Sans looked up at you when the car jerked into motion again.

“Where are you going now?” He said somewhat listlessly.

“ _We_ are going to save _our_ family, and pay a certain someone a special visit.”

This was going to be one _hell_ of a roadtrip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for reading n' everything! It really makes my day!
> 
> Don't forget to leave all your criticisms in the comments :)  
>   
> [Tumblr](http://secretly-tsundere.tumblr.com/)


	4. Prolapsio

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which there is even more dialogue

Dawn broke over the horizon, golden light spilling into the car and over the two of you. Sans was softly snoring in the passenger seat, a peaceful smile replacing his usually forced one. You smiled, reminded of years ago when Sans was himself. Yes, he had problems but he never seemed so disconnected and distant like he did now. He looked a lot younger in his sleep, not so tired of the problems that the world hurled at him.

Almost as if he sensed you staring, he woke up with a start, looking confused for a second before stretching as much as he could in the cramped car.

“Mornin’ sunshine.” You deadpanned.

“Ugh, you should invest in some better seats,” He rubbed his neck in discomfort, grimacing slightly. He glanced at you briefly, “Do ya wanna… uhh… pull over and I can drive for a bit if you want.” You guessed that you looked pretty tired. To be honest, a break sounded pretty good. You nodded briefly, watching for places you could pull over onto the side of the road.

Sans eventually swapped with you and pushed the engine into gear somewhat violently. He was clearly very anxious about getting to his brother. You chose to close your eyes and attempt to sleep but the thoughts running through your mind barred you from rest.

The journey would take anywhere from a bit over a week, to three weeks. It depended on whether it would be physically possible for one of you to drive at night. And that was without any disturbances. Your family had chosen to move very far away from the mountain in an attempt to start completely anew, while other monsters opted to stay in the aptly named Ebott- a small town at the bottom of the mountain, which was now entirely populated by monsters.

For whatever reason, you _knew_ that you would find Chara somewhere in the underground. It like your soul was leading you to where you needed to go. You could also feel that your family was alive, but it may not stay that way for long if you weren’t quick enough.

Some time later you fell asleep, the rumbling of the car your lullabye. Sans was silent until he gently nudged you awake.

“Hey, hey kid. Do you wanna get a bite to eat?”

You grumbled something resembling yes in response. You noticed that he had pulled into a seedy-looking diner by the side of the road. The two of you walked in, sitting in a booth in the corner. The only other people were a couple of tired-looking truck drivers and an old lady sipping at a cup of coffee.

You ate quickly; a mixture of hunger gurgling in your empty stomach and wanting to get out of that gross place as soon as possible. Before long, you were back in the car with Sans still at the steering wheel.

After an awkward silence, he cleared his non-existant throat and gruffly said, “Look, kiddo, I’m sorry for the radio silence over the years. _Tibia_ honest, I don’t have much of an excuse,  but I hope you can _ulna-_ stand that I have actually missed you, believe-it-or-not.” You laughed way too much at his silly puns, and he gave you a slightly weird look.

“Sorry,” you said wiping a tear from one of your eyes, “it’s just that I haven’t heard any puns in so long.” You took a deep breath to continue, “Yes, I am pretty pissed at you Sans, but I’ve missed ya too.”

He laughed slightly, “I haven’t said any puns in a while, so I may be a little rusty on that front.”

The two of you sat in a more comfortable silence for a while longer before he turned to you and asked, “Um… if it’s okay with you, can I have a quick smoke?” you nodded, “Could you light a cigarette for me then? I don’t want to have to pull over.” You did as he asked, and on the fourth attempt lit it successfully. The thick smell filled the small space around you, so you rolled down your window and stuck your head outside.

“Why do you smoke? For real.” You asked him

“I guess it helps me to relax,” He said simply.

“I don’t know anything about monster anatomy, but that shit can’t be good for you. It’ll kill you one day.”

“Good.” He said, causing you to gasp out of shock. Noticing your expression he continued, “If it’s a way to shorten my time on this damn planet then I’m all for it.”

You didn’t want to delve any deeper.

The next four days went by in a similar fashion; Sans would drive for a while as you slept, you’d get something to eat from a shitty, seedy diner and then switch drivers. On two of the nights, you stayed in a couple of cheap motels. However, the two of you were running out of money fast and could barely afford gas for the car.

Occasional chatter diluted the harsh silence of the road, becoming more and more frequent as the hours droned by. The two of you would joke and reminisce about the times in the underground, but steering clear of the subject that was Chara. You hated to admit that you were enjoying Sans’ company once again. His walls were starting to come back down again and every so often, you’d see a glimse of the old Sans in the strange way his skull would cringle when he laughed, or when he would wipe a non-existant tear from his eyesocket.

It made you realise why the two of you were once so close.

On the fourth evening, Sans pulled into what looked like a half-decent bar by the side of the road. He led you in, holding the door open for you with a mocking flourish. He walked ahead and sat on a bar stool, patting the stool next to him. After you sat, he ordered two drinks that you didn’t quite hear and turned to you.

“Kinda fancy, huh?” He wiggled his ‘eyebrows’.

You looked around the dimly lit room, “I guess it’s a nice change from the crappy 24 hour diners.” You paused, “but I thought we didn’t have enough money for places like this?”

“Eh, I brought a bit extra for something like this.” He shrugged.

The bartender placed two drinks in front of you and Sans immediately grabbed his and took a sip. “Decent whiskey.” He said, staring at the whiskey with a certain doting look in his eyes.

You took a experimental sip of the drink, feeling the satisfying burn as it slid down your throat. You rarely drank alcohol, on the basis that you were a total lightweight and hated being drunk altogether.

“You know Frisk, doing all of this is _whiskey_ business.” You snorted way too loudly at his terrible pun, laughing quietly into your drink as other customers began to stare. “Chara is probably going to try _tequila_ you.” Despite the puns, you could feel the underlying serious nature of the conversation.

“I know, Sans.” You challenged him with your eyes, feeling determination setting in, “And I won’t let her. I’m not a child anymore. I knew what I was getting into as soon as I left my apartment back in Edmond.

“If it means that I can save our family, I will put my life on the line,” you continued. “And if it comes down to it, I can defend myself. I’ve fought before, if you hadn’t realised.”

He sighed, “That’s not it though. You may have fought monsters before, but I’ve fought _Chara._ She is a relentless killer, and will stop at _nothing_ to get what she wants. She can’t be SPARED like everyone else, she won’t accept your mercy.”

He took another sip of his drink before continuing, “I’m not going to talk about this now, for the sake of all the others in this bar, but I think confronting Chara face to face is a bad idea.”

You were ready to lash back, but caught yourself. “Let’s just drop the subject for now, and talk about something else. Like… I’ll ask a question which you answer and then I’ll answer a question of yours?”

He looked at you suspiciously before his gaze softened slightly, “Okay, why does Chara have half your soul?”

You looked down at your hands, “Somehow, I don’t exactly know how, she made me take out my soul so she could split it and take half. I don’t know why she didn’t take all of it, and I don’t know how it helps her. I have a feeling that having it means she is more… corporeal. But the soul looked… sort of… dead, so I feel like she is looking for something that will make it stronger.”

There was a moment of silence while the two of you took a sip of whiskey each, before you asked, “Did you really mean it when you said you didn’t want Chara to hurt me?”

He spat out a mouthful of whiskey in surprise. He collected himself and answered, his pupils boring holes into your eyes, “I do care about you, kiddo. Have you forgotten all those years before- well… you know, before? Chara wouldn’t hesitate to kill you, but _you,_ you wouldn’t be able to dispose of her.”

“What do you mean? Do you think that I’m weak or something? I’m not some child that needs to be protected anymore!” You spat, “You always manage to ruin things, don’t you? You know, I was actually quite enjoying hanging out with you again, but you just keep treating me like a child! I don’t need your fucking protection!” You stormed out of the bar, not caring that you had caused a scene.

You slammed the car door behind you as you scrambled into your red ford, anger coursing through you. _In, out, in, out._ You tried to calm your frustrated breaths, but in doing so you started choking up. You could feel tears pricking at the corners of your eyes, threatening to spill out. With a single thought about the conversation that just passed, the floodgates well and truly opened. All you could hear were your keening cries and raspy gasps for air.

What you hated most was how that damn skeleton like such a child, such a ‘kid’. You wanted him to at least see you as an adult, as an equal. You thought you were finally getting through to him, finally breaking down those walls surrounding that mind of his, but he’d thrown them right up in your face as soon as you asked him something personal.

Why did you want him to see you as an adult?

As you delved deeper into the darker corners of your mind you began to drown, horrified with what you found. You thought about the butterflies that filled your stomach when he was near you, the way your spine would tingle when your heard the deep, velvety rumble that was his voice. You thought about the way electricity would crackle across your skin at even the smallest brush of his hand. You remembered those awful dreams you used to have before you moved and he was silent, dreams where you’d imagine the two of you doing the most horrific acts.

And he had basically just told you that he would never like you in that way.

You literally slapped yourself in the face, disgusted by the feelings you were developing for the skeleton. He was practically your family, and God knows how much older than you, and a monster. This childish crush you seemed to have was both revolting and utterly pointless. Even in a world where… _being_ with him would be acceptable, he would never have feelings towards you; you were a human, a child.

To him you were just a child.

_Dammit,_ you cursed yourself as you carried on bawling your fucking eyes out. You could do nothing to stop the tears, so you gave up and just waited for whenever Sans would come back.

_If_ he came back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! Don't forget to leave your feedback in the comments, good or bad :)
> 
> I enjoyed writing this chapter (well, at least the end). THE SHIP IS BEGINNING TO SAIL!!!  
>   
> [Tumblr](http://secretly-tsundere.tumblr.com/)


	5. Tenebrae

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **TW: REFERENCED SELF HARM AND SOME PRETTY INTENSE SELF HATING AT THE START. **  
> **  
> Most of this is at the start so I'll put this --*-- where you can read from if you want to skip all of that. Take care of yourselves and know your boundaries and triggers everyone. :)**

The next three days were awkward to say the least. They crawled by in uncomfortable silence, just the gentle hum of the car in the background. Neither of you had talked since the bar incident, well… not _really_ talked. Your conversations never went past deciding which shitty diner to eat at or the weather. It made the days long and the road dull.

Sans, unsurprisingly, was totally unreadable for the duration. When he drove, his pupils focused blankly on the narrow road ahead, never darting away. A fake grin was constantly plastered to his face too, but you couldn’t see what he was hiding beneath it. Over the years, you’d become skilled at deciphering the hidden emotions behind Sans’s smiling façade, but what unnerved you now was that you couldn’t see anything at all.

_Damn it,_ you thought, _why does he have to throw up that wall? I thought he would still trust me at least, but he is just as guarded as he would be around a total stranger._

Subconsciously, you tried to use anger to deal with this sudden withdrawal, but it genuinely hurt you to feel so disconnected from him. Not because of your _stupid_ crush on the skeleton but simply because you thought he was at least your friend still.

How much had truly deteriorated between you to make it come to this?

Your heart was still sore from the argument you’d had in the bar, but this rejection hit harder. It felt like he didn’t care about you at all. _Maybe that’s true though, he probably only came to get his brother and leave. Why would he give a single shit about me? After all, he didn’t ‘care’ enough to spare me even a single text while I was gone, why should he suddenly be ‘besties’ with me again?_

Unfortunately, the silence had also given your overactive mind a chance to dwell on some darker thoughts. Mainly about Sans too.

You despised the way that he affected you, even in the total silence. How you would be internally reduced to a quivering mess at even the brush of his hand when you passed him his lighter, or the rare eye contact you shared during meals. Not only did it render you completely and utterly useless, the whole premise was altogether disgusting. He might as well have been an uncle or even brother to you over the years, and you were _crushing_ on him?

And it wasn’t like this was a new thing either.

You remembered having similar thoughts about him before you moved out, and feeling similar things. You hadn’t thought much of it until you did _unspeakable_ things to yourself with his name on your tongue. Only then did you realise how wrong the whole crush was.

You went through a phase of total abstinence; stopping yourself from thinking about him entirely. But that was short-lived after having a horrific dream of the two of you _having sex._ Even thinking about it made you want to throw up.

After that you became slightly more destructive. You remembered you would carve lines into your skin with scissors (knives made you uneasy), punishing yourself for your own feelings. Now each scar was a reminder of every time your heart called out and your stomach filled with butterflies. That ended when your mom found out and cried with you until the early hours of the morning.

Those feelings only left you when you finally moved into the city, replaced with only bitterness because of his silence.

But now they were back in full force, and you didn’t know if you could stop them.

  
\--*--  


You were absentmindedly curling a few strands of hair around your fingers when you noticed the people staring. Sans had just pulled into a seedy-looking village in the hope of finding somewhere to eat, but it was becoming rather unnerving as the car slowly rolled down a road.

You could only see humans walking down the street, not even a hint of a monster in sight. _Strange,_ you thought, _this place is pretty close to Ebott._ You watched as mothers hurried their curious children on and fathers watched you with burning hatred. You watched as people threw quick sneers or uttered words that you couldn’t hear. You watched as some people just outright stared, perhaps out of curiosity, perhaps out of confusion.

You could tell that the two of you may not be entirely welcome here.

You had heard of endless anti-monster communities scattered across the country; villages and towns of humans that barred any monsters from living there. But this one was surprisingly close to the mountain. Most places round here were pretty liberal in terms of human-monster fraternisation.

There was something about the village that was disturbingly familiar, the feeling siting at the pit of your stomach. You had never been here before, as far as you remember. In fact, after leaving the mountain, you and your family were advised to steer clear from here.

So why did you feel like you recognised it?

Sans pulled up by the side of the road a couple of blocks away from the diner, and you both cautiously climbed out of the car. You walked over to Sans slowly, eyeing the pedestrians around you.

"I don’t think this is a great idea,” You whispered to him, “This place feels kinda... sketchy.”

He glanced at you before replying, “The next town is 10 miles away, and I don’t know about you but I am starving. This can’t be too bad, anyway. This is in public. We’re only gonna get a few looks here and there.”

You walked a lot closer to Sans than you normally would on the way to the diner, and were followed by shouts of “Monster Fucker!” and “Dirty Undergrounder!” This was such a bad idea.

The diner went silent as the two of you walked in, everyone’s eyes on you. You anxiously crept up to the bar and perched on a stool, and was pleasantly surprised when the waitress behind the counter looked at you pityingly rather than with disdain and hate.

Once the silence eased off, she leaned in and whispered to you, “I’m sorry about all of this. Actually, I’m sorry about the whole town. They don’t take too kindly to monster folk.”

“You talk as if you’re not from here?” Sans asked her.

“I do live here, but I used to be in Ebott, like a lot of people ‘round these parts. A lot of us were kicked out to make room for monsters a few years back. A lot of them are still bitter about it.” She drawled.

“Why aren’t you?” You asked out of curiosity.

She smiled slightly, “Not quite everyone in this damn place is a monsterphobe. I’ve learned to forget ‘bout it and live in the present. I’m glad that some monster out there gets a home and a job somewhere safe and where they will be welcome. I’m safe enough out here but a monster wouldn’t survive a week here.”

Her tone brightened, “Anyway, what can I get y’all?”

You glanced at Sans, “Just two burgers and a serving of fries, please. Oh, and with extra ketchup.” You ordered. At this point in your journey you didn’t really have to ask Sans to know what he’d want.

After just a few minutes the kind waitress came back with a greasy-looking paper bag. “I’m so sorry but however much I want to, I can’t let you two eat in. Managers orders.” She gave you a sympathetic look.

You just smiled and stood up, “I understand. I wouldn’t want us to ruin your business-“

You were cut off by a yell coming from across the room, “Hey, it’s that bitch from the news! The whore who let all the fucking demons out of their hole!” A roar of shouts suddenly erupted in the diner. You could barely make out anything that was being said due to both the sheer number of voices shouting and the thick accents that accompanied each one.

Sans grabbed your arm suddenly albeit gently, sending lightning bolts up your arm. “We should get outta here.” He said in a dangerous low voice.

He teleported you to the car, both of you quickly getting in. He drove off quickly, the still warm bag of food on your lap. The two of you eventually found a back street which seemed safe enough. With a heaving sigh, Sans leisurely got out the car and you followed suit, clutching the paper baggie.

He lit a cigarette and leaned against the wall. “This was not a good idea”

“Ya think?” You replied with a dry chuckle.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

You sat with Sans in the fresh night air, cigarette smoke drifting lazily around you. You had decided to both take a few hours break from the road, and were sitting in that same village under a cloak of darkness. If anything, it was safer for the two of you once the sun went down. You hadn’t seen anybody out on the streets, and it wasn’t like you were by yourself.

“Um…” Sans coughed hoarsely, “I just wanna say sorry, yanno, if I said something to offend you in that bar. To be honest I don’t remember much.” When you looked at him with a questioning gaze he simply answered with, “I drank a bit more after you left.” He looked down guiltily at his feet.

“How… how much did you have?”

“Too much.” He said curtly.

You sighed, “it’s okay. I’m sorry if I overreacted a bit. I’m just so _damn tired_ of being treated like a child.” Sans just hummed quietly in response.

“I understand. Kinda.” He took a drag of the cigarette hanging lazily between his fingers. “When Paps was younger, he… he would get so angry that he had to wear a striped shirt and I didn’t. It’s a monster thing. We wear stripes until we fully mature, since monsters come in so many different shapes n’ sizes. No one wants to be mistaken for a kid.”

A sudden boldness took over your being as you leaned forward and asked, “How old are you, Sans?”

Age wasn’t really a big thing in the monster community, since they might as well be immortal. Monsters only actually aged until they had a child to channel their soul and magic into. A human life was just a fleeting moment for a monster.

“Well…” he paused, “Me n’ Paps are actually a lot younger than all the other guys. Asgore and Tori are by far the oldest, Undyne and Alph are a lot younger than them, but still a lot older than us. I’d say I’m probably about 40 years old by now, give or take a decade. But that’s discounting all the extra timelines. ‘Cause of all them, it feels like I’ve been around for at least a century. Paps is 32. He’s still just a little baby bones.” A new warmth entered his once hardened expression, which transformed into a deep sadness.

“I miss him too.” You placed a cautious hand on his arm. It felt like your heart shattered into a million pieces when he slightly flinched away from your touch.

Your head snapped round to your left, where you swear you heard quick footsteps. But the whole street was totally empty. “Did you hear that?” You asked Sans quietly. The hairs on the back of your neck suddenly prickled, and goosebumps crawled across your skin.

“Hear what?” A foreign voice suddenly said behind you before a rough hand clamped down over your mouth, killing whatever scream was rising in your throat. The voice was sharp and croaky, like a rusty nail. “Knock out the demon and do what you want with him. We only want the girl.” The same voice said. It sounded vaguely female, but it was difficult to tell because it was so raspy.

You suddenly saw Sans getting hit by some blunt object in your peripheral vision. The lights quickly faded in his eye sockets and his tense body quickly slackened. Two burly men roughly grabbed him and literally dragged him off. You sent a silent prayer to anything that might be up there, begging that they wouldn’t dust Sans as soon as they took him into an alley.

Just as you were about to call out to him, something hit the back of your head. Hard. And the world faded from view, leaving only black. The blackness of your mind. The blackness of Chara’s heart. The blackness of charred cigarette butts.

Only blackness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I know that it has been a bit of a wait for this chapter and for that I'm sorry. I'll make it up to y'all by adding another chapter at the weekend. woop \\(^^)/  
>   
> [Tumblr](http://secretly-tsundere.tumblr.com/)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to everyone who got this far! I know that this is quite short, but it is the prologue. Expect more to come as in a flurry of inspiration, I wrote a few chapters ahead in one night which are much longer than this.
> 
> Again, don't forget to comment all of your opinions and criticisms.
> 
> If you want to, check out my tumblr where I sometimes put fanfic updates and a bit of art.  
>   
> [Tumblr](http://secretly-tsundere.tumblr.com/)


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